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Why some Black women only date White Men

Posted by James, 17 Jan 08

We always talk about Black women and how they can’t date White men. Well, there are those black women that only date White men. I remember a pal of mine telling me once that she will never get married to Black man. And even as kids, when playing make believe, she was always married to a White guy.

The reason for women like her who only date white men may be very similar to the reasons why most Black women only date Black men … attraction. Some also feel that Black men treat them better than any other man ever could, and they feel that they'd rather have what they know instead of experimenting with what they don’t know.

Some Black women are just not physically attracted to Black men. And as much as parents usually like hooking us up with people of our own race, well it reaches a time when you have to be honest with yourself. Imagine my pal for example: As a child, her first crush was Adam Sandler, then as she got older, she fell in love with Mel Gibson. This doesn’t mean that Black men aren’t handsome – they are just not her type.

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Some also feel that White men (not ALL but many) find black women to be remarkable in every sense of the word; hence Black women tend to gravitate towards those affections. Much as her husband treats her better than any man ever had, one lady admits that she has been with some White men that disgusted her with their behaviors. But she says that generally, older White men and very mature on a broader level than with Black men on many levels.

Some are just wildly turned on by the differences … skin color, hair, being raised in different cultures, music, foods … the list is endless. Its all about the desire for the mysterious and unknown. And for some, its just pure love because there are those that forget that we are ‘black’ and ‘white’ and just coincidentally happened to fall in love with a White guys.

One thing we all have to remember is that not every White man is a Black woman’s dream. It all depends on the individual … good and bad comes in all colors.

With that said, the generic phrase - ‘It should be about love and not color’ – is cute. But in this case, not entirely truthful. Its not only about love. Much as love gets cultivated eventually, there is physical attraction and a declaration to date only one race. Racist or preference?

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  1.   mitchmi says:
    Posted: 01 Sep

    I have never dated a white man before.I'm open to meeting someone interesting.My best friend is married to an awesome Irish man,He's the best man she has ever met.I hope I'd meet an amazing man on here.

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  2.   NubianQnNJ says:
    Posted: 19 Jun

    Ladies, it’s nice you’re professing your love for white Men. But please be careful. Not every white man is created equal. Maybe we shouldn’t look at color and look at personal character.

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  3.   Blueberry28 says:
    Posted: 30 Apr

    i rather date outside of my race than the same race let them get mad. the dislike comes from people in the same race. i been dating white men every since 2007. i been getting dirty looks from black guys and mixed guys too. they dont even looked at me in the eye. thats weird.usually white guys give me eye contact.

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  4.   nunomig says:
    Posted: 27 Feb

    PORTUGUESE LIVING IN UK SEEKING A WOMAN FOR A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP....

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  5.   nunomig says:
    Posted: 27 Feb

    i hope everyone is fine down here. if any lovely lass wishes to keep in touch then, send me a message.

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  6.   Reggie431 says:
    Posted: 27 Jan

    Never thought about this...was raised on a farm in Georgia USA in large measure by African Americans both women and men during the 1960's. I don't understand what the problem is here. I am a major, major southern white redneck boy and I don't see why the rap on black men at all..the rap should be on the punk ass Sissy boys on this site who are attempting to subjugate the black woman and use her for sexual exploitation to merely satisfy a curiosity which would constitute most capped tooth tanning bed chicken s***t whites on this site anyway!!!

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  7.   skeletonlove says:
    Posted: 19 Jan

    Better late thn never,,, in my case dating a white man it has been running in my head since teenage years,, I haven't given up yet am still waiting for that special someone,,, I know he is probably somewhere else waiting for me too....

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  8.   MissQTPi says:
    Posted: 01 Jan

    I’ve been treated like a queen by every white man I’ve ever dated. I don’t see color in finding a mate but I know my preference would be to share my love and my life with a white man. They open doors, pull out chairs, etc. CHIVALRY is not dead with them. And they TRULY love black women: the way we carry ourselves, our confidence in our sexuality, our intelligence. It’s as much a turn on for them as it is for me. First time a man pulled out the chair for me to sit at dinner I was stuck for a second looking at him like what you waiting for sit already! Then I realized after a few awkward moments he was waiting on ME to sit. Spoke volumes to me about being appreciated and adored

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    • crowraven364 says:
      Posted: 07 Jul

      So very true. The white men I've encountered have been very mannered and courteous. I've been VERY attracted to white guys all my life.

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  9.   BBW4fun says:
    Posted: 28 Dec 17

    I date only white men because that's mostly what I'm attracted to.

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  10.   Purii says:
    Posted: 22 Dec 17

    I have been attracted to white men

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  11.   Purii says:
    Posted: 22 Dec 17

    I have been attracted to white men

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  12.   Gdluckcharm says:
    Posted: 20 Dec 17

    I have been attracted to white men nearly all my life (as far back as '76). It's not about color... it's simply a preference. They respect me more than most black men, and as we all know, there's good and bad in all races. Hopefully I'll meet my MR. RIGHT on this site one day.

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  13.   hope826 says:
    Posted: 25 Nov 17

    I prefer to date white men, though I have pretty much like what I like regardless of color. But if I were to choose, ever since I could remember I have been attracted to white men. Though I seemed to always end up with a black guy. And I think thats because white men never really seemed interested in me. Or maybe I have never put myself in the environment or opportunity to do so. Where I live seeing a black woman with a white man will still get a double take. Or I think white men are caught up on the stereotyping the media put out of the angry black woman that they are afraid to approach because they think we will eat them or something, lol.

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  14.   ruham says:
    Posted: 30 Oct 17

    Nice

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  15.   MimiM86 says:
    Posted: 21 Oct 17

    I have dated white men for as long as I can remember. It is true: you're attracted to whom you're attracted to. I have nothing against black men it's just that I was raised differently and just don't get along with many of them the way I get along with many white men. I have never been apologetic for my attraction and never will.

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    • crowraven364 says:
      Posted: 07 Jul

      Well stated. I feel the same way. I've been attracted to white men since I was a young girl. Blue eyes with dark hair tends to set my heart afire !!!

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  16.   ddtt says:
    Posted: 21 Sep 17

    I wish I can find my white husband here

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  17.   DC- says:
    Posted: 17 Sep 17

    I met one young African American lady who preferred only White men. She just explained how she got along with them better.

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  18.   luvgluve says:
    Posted: 07 Aug 17

    Professionalism,I believe is why:)

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  19.   kel123456789 says:
    Posted: 07 May 17

    I just love White men

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  20.   LadyHaiti says:
    Posted: 30 Mar 17

    Poorly treated by my own people, made sense to date white. Also I love Polys!!

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  21.   Deeniey says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 17

    I ran away from my attraction to white men for most of my life. (Growing up post apartheid in South Africa made it less interesting to feel need to pursue the mystery)I got absolutely no problem with black guys. I believe a character is not entirely built on colour , all races have their good and bad. I'd like to find the good in what I prefer, what excites me and in this case, it's the white brothers.

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  22.   Elegantbae says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 17

    I have never dated a White man before, but I have always been attracted to them. That is the reason why I joined this site. To find my white man. Hope it works out well for me

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    • dxtroyer says:
      Posted: 19 Mar 17

      Is because you want to go to Europe or American, Canada etc.is not love we know everything woman but try your luck..

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      • Chrishibbert says:
        Posted: 03 Apr 17

        Maybe the women are fed up with low class black men.

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        • Crewold says:
          Posted: 10 May 17

          yea i dont try to be a hater but the guy is right about a few stuff most of the girls wanna have a relationship to benefit themselves w something money visas stuff like this and if they need to do something for it they just leaving easily so i think most of the black girls saying they attracted to old white man they starting to realise that young white mans not stupid and desperate enough to spend they life on them but yea can just say what they guy go for it even tough i think its a shame anybody willing to pay just to have someone and find it really stupid disgusting and stuff that girls can do anything with a saggy old man for money but this is how it is

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      • FmaleLedRshp says:
        Posted: 18 Jun 17

        Bitterness at it's finest lol.. The thought that she just doesn't want you and yours is rather painful huh? The ideas we entertain to feel better about ourselves..

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      • FmaleLedRshp says:
        Posted: 04 Nov 17

        LOL, what an entitled statement. There are BW who actually prefer WM- no strings attached. But whatever soothes your ego..

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        • blackbelle01 says:
          Posted: 28 Nov 17

          I agree most BM feel entitled to BW and feel that BW can not have preference but of course BM can have a preference.

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  23.   Nazret says:
    Posted: 25 Jan 17

    Im black girl and im crazy to meet and i like white men allways opportunitie party will attract each other more resion

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  24.   Godloveher says:
    Posted: 22 Jan 17

    Can someone please tell me if this site is real, because some of these men I met are time waister,who are just interested of seen you on messenger,.. Need your help.

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    • Gdluckcharm says:
      Posted: 20 Mar 17

      The site is real. Just pay close attention to the grammar when they text you, and if they want you to move to a app to talk. Trust me, I've been there and done that. But, I must say, I recently met a wonderful MAN on this site just last month. Good luck on your search.

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    • Curlio says:
      Posted: 07 Jul 17

      It's true most of them are time waisted.

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    • hors3fly says:
      Posted: 21 Jul 17

      Some of the men are testing the water so to speak . Their are a lot of women out their that just using these dating site for self gain for money f2f o being in a poor country or just being plain lazy and not want a real job .

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  25.   BrownQueen36 says:
    Posted: 27 Dec 16

    It doesn't matter the color, I have learned that all men have good and bad in them. Although we all have preferences, we should be careful not to date or marry for color. It should be for true love, respect and a spiritual relationship with God. That is what holds a relationship together.

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  26.   JuriHan says:
    Posted: 29 Nov 16

    I've pretty much solely dated white men my entire life with the exception of a black guy in college. I simply like what I like. I don't think that there is anything wrong with black men, however I'm only attracted to white men primarily and sometimes East Asian men. I have nothing against black men, I have an amazing father and brother. I also never had an issue attracting black OR white men. I'm personally not physically attracted to black men. As I've gotten older I am no longer apologetic for my interests. I now only exclusively date white men and my current bf of 3 years is white as well. Life is too short to not date who you want.

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  27.   Godloveher says:
    Posted: 17 Nov 16

    For me I am totally finish with black men,all because of my son father,he treats us has if we are no body...I always admire white men,but never lucky to date one...so my wish his to find a committed one who will be a great husband to me and my son.

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  28.   DiaBrownyEye says:
    Posted: 10 Oct 16

    It is something that can't be controlled or forced really. I also can't remember myself attracted to any other race but white. My 1st crush at 4yrs old was a white boy lol. Yep and I am black, fortunately it has never been a problem with my family.

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  29.   Bonniemae says:
    Posted: 29 Sep 16

    I'm open to men of all walks of life I can't judge a man based on his color its just a layer of skin thats not even one inch thick.

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  30.   Mwichy says:
    Posted: 31 Aug 16

    Black and white never go wrong it was a match color made in heaven.hoping to find a white man..so help me God

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  31.   elegant2016 says:
    Posted: 29 Aug 16

    I do not seek white men. They usually find me. I asked a few why is it they are quick to approach me and not a black man. I have dated white men who felt comfortable enough to say that yes they are physically attracted but it was something more that made them approach me. I dress modestly. Simply because if you dress trashy you should not be surprised by what approaches you. The way you speak and carry yourself speaks volumes. I was raised to always speak properly and dress properly. You never know where your prince is. Also I find that the more educated a black woman is the more likely she will meet that white prince. Education means you have traveled extensively. You are more open to different cultures. So if it is truly a white prince you want, if it takes awhile to find him it is because you are still a work in progress. Go back to school. Be involved in your community. The more you expose yourself to white men, the more they are sure that you can handle the experiences they bring. The beauty is he is not only a partner in love but also life. He will be your greatest mentor.

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    • Swissy says:
      Posted: 23 Oct 16

      What???? Ladies do not listen to this advice! Just be who you are, the right man will love you for that!

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      • BrownQueen36 says:
        Posted: 27 Dec 16

        You are right. I get approached by both black and white men and I am not the classy type. I am nice and friendly and carry myself in a respectful manner. I dress to the occasion and even where street clothes if I have to. So just be yourself and they will come (all types of men) not just white.

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    • ladybarb says:
      Posted: 18 Nov 16

      I totally agree with your assessment Elegant. You can't go wrong with class, elegance, being down to earth, but well mannered and educated. I have experienced what you have written and agree. Carry yourself with class and you will attract and be able to keep the same.

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  32.   val_01 says:
    Posted: 10 Jun 16

    I just hope I find someone my biological clock is ticking by ....?

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    • Kitten49 says:
      Posted: 23 Jun 16

      You will once you stop looking

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      • Kimblelene says:
        Posted: 13 Jul 16

        I understand and share the same view. My biological clock is ticking too and my white prince charm isn't here as yet lol

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  33.   val_01 says:
    Posted: 09 Jun 16

    I just love white men period, black men dislike the thought of that black women are betraying them what nonsense, so black men can date any culture and black women must stick with them to be disrespected.

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    • Redthirteen says:
      Posted: 23 Oct 16

      I'm a black man and I couldn't care less who you date. So no lol

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      • blackbelle01 says:
        Posted: 24 Oct 16

        If you could not care less who we date then why are you here posting about it.

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        • Sunryze says:
          Posted: 08 Jan 17

          His post is valid, the OP claimed 'black men dislike the thought that black women are betraying them'. As a free-thinking individual, he is seperating himself from the OP's blanket assumption that accuses all black males of thinking this way. He doesn't share that view, and is confirming so. He doesn't care who anyone dates.

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  34.   val_01 says:
    Posted: 09 Jun 16

    I remember saying this in my teens I know what my choice is by not having good roles models as men in my life ,now 45 and still searching or my soul mate I may socialise with black I just know my boundaries there is no connection , they will always treat others cultures better than their own which suppose is a good thing , I just hope I find my man on this site it's worth a try.

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  35.   Achydp says:
    Posted: 02 Jun 16

    Hoping to find my white Prince soon...I wanna be like u...

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  36.   Lonely-Lefty says:
    Posted: 02 Jun 16

    I think we tend to gravitate towards those we feel we have more in common with and society tends to make the assumption that by being of the same color we will have more in common. The reality is our inside person based on experiences and personalities play a large part in making us who we are. My experience has shown that an interracial couple with similar education are likely to have more in common in terms of likes, dislikes and ways of thinking then a couple of the same race with entirely different levels of education and occupations. Point is the more we experience the same the more we realize we are more similar regardless of skin color.

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    • Cognac_Lover says:
      Posted: 27 Aug 16

      I agree

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    • LadyHaiti says:
      Posted: 30 Mar 17

      I agree, growing up I was picked on for being an oreo. So my thought was if I was ever going to find someone I could have anything in common with it would have to be with white people. And more often than not we would have more in common.

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  37.   Lydia63 says:
    Posted: 26 May 16

    Preference

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  38.   pearlygate says:
    Posted: 21 May 16

    I've always loved&wanted to marry a WM but from my past relationship with one,hmmm..all men are the same... be they WorB

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  39.   Diamond_49 says:
    Posted: 15 May 16

    Why are all my comments being deleted and why can I no longer comment on the interracial dating page or unable to like comments and reply to them.

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  40.   Diamond_49 says:
    Posted: 15 May 16

    I definitely agree that it is about the physical attraction, I see black guys even stunning one's but it does nothing for me, but if I come across a white guy now that's a much better reaction from me, I also think that when white guy's see me that they think I am after a black guy, could be the reason why I am never approached by white guy's. .looks are most definitely deceiving.

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    • Lonely-Lefty says:
      Posted: 30 May 16

      Perhaps a white man assumes a beautiful woman like you, who happens to be black, won't be interested in them. Society sadly paints many stereotypes and some white men may feel they don't measure up to the physical attributes society often attributes to black men. Like with all stereotypes we are individuals, not our stereotypes. I hope you find a man who will , appreciate and treat you as gorgeous ad the woman I see in your pics.

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      • Diamond_49 says:
        Posted: 01 Jun 16

        I actually agree with you, but to me all men have the same physical attributes..but I actually go for a man who knows how to treat his woman and who knows how to make his woman feels like she is the best thing that has ever happened to him, to me a white man definitely delivers on that. Black men are too jealous and to darn controlling. Wish me luck.

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        • Lonely-Lefty says:
          Posted: 02 Jun 16

          Hi Diamond_49. I wish you will find a man to recognize and treat you as special as you are and make you feel as lovely as you are. You will find him!

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  41.   Iracelma says:
    Posted: 25 Mar 16

    My preference is a WM.I rarely date a black man but I like a WM some I date they can truly trust, honest,caring they know how to treat a woman. my soulmate dream is to have a WM.

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  42.   MzMecka1969 says:
    Posted: 18 Feb 16

    My preference is WM! I just love the way the way they treat me! I have dated WM since High School and we have so much in common being that I live on Long Island! And sexually...may the fun begin!!Lol!

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  43.   blackbelle01 says:
    Posted: 03 Feb 16

    BW date WM because we can. I have a preference for WM and I find them to be more family oriented and very sexy

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  44.   Brunsugah says:
    Posted: 02 Feb 16

    It's just preference, just like some men only date blonde blue eye women or petite ladies. I'm open to dating most men but have dated mainly white men.

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    • Lonely-Lefty says:
      Posted: 30 May 16

      Sometimes love grabs hold of you and draws you to a person who may not be what you are most attracted to. I grew up segregated so was attracted to white women, mostly redheads and blondes but ended up marrying a brunette.

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  45.   Bayjaytay says:
    Posted: 29 Jan 16

    As soon as I realized boys were cool, I was only looking at white boys. I have never been attracted to black men. Ever. Don't know why. I think I was just wired that way. I'm happy with it. I don't think there's always a reason. You just like what you like.

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  46.   heistheway says:
    Posted: 23 Dec 15

    That is so true

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  47.   Ceiera says:
    Posted: 26 Nov 15

    I 've always been attracted to white men. They are caring and sweet and very open minded

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    • crowraven364 says:
      Posted: 07 Jul

      Very true. In my experience white men are so caring, sensitive, and sweet. I've been attracted to white guys all my life. Now, I no longer hide it.

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  48.   lupira says:
    Posted: 21 Nov 15

    Wow,I got a courage now to doy move, thanks watch the space,wish u guys long life together, I have been having this from younger age that I will marry a white guy the way I wanted this when someone says they are "white" I said no they are lighter in complexion plz don't call them "white", I am so defensive towards them even them they do have a thing for me,its just matter of time before I met my honest, charming, caring,matured, loving life time partner,wish me luck

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  49.   SunKistBella says:
    Posted: 13 Nov 15

    I always say, "there is a rotten apple in every bunch." However, when it comes to preference over whom you're attracted to, be honest with yourself. I have always had an affinity toward Latino, Polynesian, and White men. It does not mean I have not dated Black men, I have, from different parts of the US, and usually ran into a common denominator that did not match up with dating compatibility or a shared common value of life. Black women are looking for love, but love without all the hoops, games etc., we seem to run into with our experiences dating black men. I am a firm believer that this many women speaking out about the dysfunction they've experienced with dating black men cannot be just a coincidence. My experience dating men from other ethnicities have been the most positive experiences, mutual respect, genuine care, stability, maturity, etc. Be with the person that makes you a better person, love is color blind. "We are all one race, and that is the Human Race." Sharmaine

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  50.   Sweetzuu says:
    Posted: 13 Nov 15

    U

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