Answer to the biggest question on V-Day: Does he love me? 5 ways to figure out!

Posted by Juan, 08 Feb

So you have this guy you have been crazy about but you have a nagging question on your mind: Does he love me? Find out this Valentines by reading on...

Does he love me or lust me? Find out the difference this Valentine’s day

Now that Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, many people are looking to their loved ones to make grandiose declarations of love. I mean, who wouldn’t want that special someone to give them flowers and candles while lying on rose petals sprinkled ever so carefully on soft sheets?

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However, it is perfectly okay to wonder whether these acts of love are really love. Are you wondering - does he love me or is he hiding lust behind all that jazz? Or were you sure of his love in the past but now you’re asking yourself does he still love me?

Here’s how you can tell!

1. Be sure that their love for you isn’t just a Valentine’s Day thing

This one will require intuition—lots of intuition. Hopefully, you’ve been with this person before Valentine’s Day, and you have noticed first-hand how they treat you. So, if you have been paying attention to how they make you feel, would you say he loves you? When you begin to wonder does he love me body language will help you know! You need to know whether his sudden love for you is brought on by the season of love or if he truly means what he is saying.

Before now, has he always gone out of his way to make you feel special? Have you guys ever planned for the future together? Has he ever plainly told you he loves you? Yes, you need to hear it, otherwise, why are you even in a relationship with them? The sex may be great and all, but you have to investigate his feelings for you!

Has he ever talked about the future with you?

It’s easy to get caught up in the moment and forget that real love should last for a long time. If it’s all fun and games for him with no mention of the future, then how can you be sure that he’s really into it as much as you are? Now, this doesn’t mean you have to put pressure on him to commit to you forever. It just means you have to stay vigilant and watch out for signs that he’s in for the long haul.

A man that wants to stay with you will talk about future plans. He’ll let it slip that he’s looking to stay with you for a long time. You’ll know when he listens to your career or academic plans and finds a way to subtly inject himself into them. He will invest in your future if he intends to be a part of it. This investment doesn’t have to be monetary. It might just be as simple as offering insight into your long-term projects and goals. When he’s into you, you’ll never have to ask the question - Does he love me?

2. He wants more than sex

Sex is important. Unfortunately, it isn’t strong enough to sustain a relationship. And girlfriend, you deserve more than a man who is just there for some booty. How can you tell if sex is the only thing he is after?

Well, if you are always getting the occasional ‘hey stranger’ texts from him late at night, then your man is possibly up to no good. Also, outside of the bedroom, does he make time to get to know you as a person. Our recommendation on Love is All Colors is to run away from anyone who is only out to know you in bed.

Here’s why you need to take a hike if sex is the only attraction for him. For one, the passion might wane eventually, and your whole relationship could go down the drain with it. Also, you don’t want to end up feeling used and abused—trust me, this happens more times than you can think.

3. He makes you a part of his world

Nothing screams I love you more than a man who makes it his life’s duty to establish you firmly in his life. His family and friends will know about you because he will deem you too important to be a secret. No amount of internet's does he love me or lust me quiz can tell you of his true feelings more than the way he makes sure he includes you in his affairs.

Does he claim you in public?

It’s one thing for a man to be all over you in private. But if he’s actively trying to avoid being seen with you, then you should rethink the relationship. Any man who loves you will proudly show the world that you guys belong together. He will never shy away from staking his claim to you.

So what are the tell-tale signs that he is proud of you?

Well, you’ll feature heavily on his social media accounts. He’ll happily post pictures of you guys together.  Wanting to be Instagram-official isn’t a bad thing!

Apart from the world knowing about the relationship through social media, he’ll take you to social events to show you off to his work colleagues and people within his circle. If a man takes out time to do this for you, then you’ll never have to ask yourself - Does he love me?

He lets you know what’s going on in his life

Is he in love with you if he doesn’t even make the effort to keep you in the loop? When someone loves you, he keeps you up to date with what's going on in his life. He will share almost every detail about his day. No story will be too boring to recount to you. If you’re wondering  - Does he really love me, you have to consider the effort he makes to keep in touch. Letting you know what’s going on with him is a sweet way to tell you I love you!

He treats you like a priority

How to know he loves you is when he treats you as a priority. One way to answer the question is if he puts you first then you know he loves you.

When he creates time for you out of his busy schedule, you will know that your relationship with him is important. You have to learn how to tell if someone is lusting after you. And if he doesn't try to be with you, maybe its time you read this and make him miss you.

4. Does he hold a grudge forever?

You’ll never have to ask yourself does he love me if your man doesn’t keep grudges. Letting fights linger is a sure sign that he may not be into you as much as you think.  A great way to know if he loves you is watching how long he is willing to go without talking to you after a fight. Does he love me test doesn’t get more accurate than when a man lets go of any ill-feeling towards you just because you are more important to him than any quarrel.

If he goes for days or weeks on end without talking to you after you guys get into a heated exchange, then you can question his love for you! You shouldn’t be with someone who makes you wonder - does he still love me - after a fight.

He is not afraid to cry on your shoulder

Okay, we’re not saying you should expect you man to sob on your shoulders until his tears soak through your blouse. This may likely never happen. However, your man will show you he loves you by making you his confidante. This means he will feel free to tell you his deepest fears. He won’t keep his weaknesses from you either.

When a man isn’t afraid to let his vulnerability show, you should keep him because that answers your does he love me question.

5. Does he actually say he loves you?

When you aren’t feeling your man’s love, it is only natural to start wondering: Does he really love me? If he isn’t saying it, then it just means he doesn’t feel it. This might just be him being honest about his feelings for you. Don’t feel needy just because you want your man to proclaim his love for you. You shouldn’t have to force it out of him either. When you begin to wonder does he love me body language alone will not show if he does or not. He needs to say it.

His I love yous should come effortlessly and at random times. It doesn’t have to slip out of him during sex or only when you insist on hearing it.

If he loves you, you will know

Okay, here’s the real shocker: if he loves you, you will know! You will never have to ask, does he love me, because the answer will be as plain as day. Women are gifted with intuition sharp enough to detect when he’s just out to play with your feelings. There will be no need to take any does he love me test if a niggling voice deep down is telling you he doesn’t.

Pay attention. Listen to that gut feeling that may be giving you an error alert. His love for you will be evident in the little things he does.

What to Do if He Doesn’t Love You

It sucks to feel unloved by your man, especially if he is the center of your world. The bitter truth is that you shouldn’t be with anyone who doesn’t love you. It might be painful for you to walk away, but if you ever have to wonder, does he love me or lust me, then you might want to rethink the whole relationship.

Don’t despair! Here’s what to do if he doesn’t love you. You can cry and mourn. It is a painful realization, after all. But don’t linger there for too long. There’s someone out there who is dying to be with you.

Read one of our interracial couples’ success stories about this couple whose first offline date was on Valentine’s day.

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