69% of Men Get Rejected Before a First Date

Posted by Evan, 12 Aug

If you look at the top of the page under my name, you’ll see two short sentences:

Understand Men. Find Love.

Find your soulmate on Swirlr

I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that if men understood women, they’d do better with women. Nor is it surprising that women who understand men do better with men.

That’s the entire essence of this blog; rather than complaining about why men should change (which they should!), it’s more powerful to understand the people you’re trying to date.

If you’re going to understand the male dating experience, a great place to look is online, where, generally, as in real-life, men are the pursuers and women are the pursued.

According to this juicy infographic, 69% of men got rejected before the first date.

Here’s a quick breakdown of how these men were rejected when asking a woman out:

  • 24% got friend-zoned
  • 29% were rejected and the woman did not suggest an alternative day
  • 47% didn’t get a reply (she didn’t text back)

Which means the most likely way a woman will reject a man is to ignore him.

Furthermore, out of the 2,454 men surveyed, only 13% made it to a second date.

As a man who dated online prolifically, I got rejected over 50% of the time before meeting. Conversely, most of my clients are ready to quit online dating if two or three cute guys don’t write back. So yes, men should know what it’s like to get horrifying dick pics or threats from angry rejectees, and women should know what it’s like to get more widespread rejection in a month than most women get in a lifetime.

Instead of comments that tell me how 85% of men are awful, creepy, stupid, perverted, old, short, and poor (when the number is actually 80%), I would love to hear you offer a sentence of sympathy for what the average man must go through to get a second date.

Your thoughts, below, are greatly appreciated.

Evan Marc Katz is a dating coach who specializes in helping smart, strong, successful women understand and connect with men since 2003. Thousands of his clients have fallen in love, gotten married, started families, and found happiness – after only a few months of coaching. His latest dating book, “Why You’re Still Single – Things Your Friends Would Tell You If You Promised Not to Get Mad”, was a critical success. He also operates a popular blog, EvanMarcKatz.com, which serves as a one-stop shop for anyone trying to understand relationship dynamics. Combining the insight of Dr. Drew and the wit of Adam Carolla, Katz has answered hundreds of challenging and controversial questions with a unique combination of logic, experience, and empathy. Take Evan's dating quiz.

3 responses to "69% of Men Get Rejected Before a First Date"

Leave a reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

  1.   62strong says:
    Posted: 30 Aug 18

    I find women who have been married and have children just want to flert and play multiple men at one time.very few women want commitment.good luck girls we have figured it out finally.have fun

    Like or Dislike: or 0 ()
    Reply to this comment
  2.   elcamino67 says:
    Posted: 25 Dec 17

    WOW!! Hard to believe that nobody has responded to this one. I guess In one of the chosen few (or honest ones - LOL) who's been rejected before. I think this whole article speaks (or REEKS - lol) of the pettiness / game playing / flakiness of SO MANY women on this site, more so of the guys who are just trying to get an honest date. Its more of an indictment upon them than us and rhe women don't come out looking good on an honest perspective. One need to do no more than peruse through their profiles and see that SHALLOWNESS ABOUNDS. From the revealing pics to the sketchy profiles. Its more than obvious that MANY women (DESPITE profiles that speak the opposite) are looking for caricatures and stereotypes of men INSTEAD of real, honest guys themselves. BOTTOM LINE: its HILARIOUS that so many women want honesty and transparency from a guy when they are TOTALLY INCAPABLE of doing the same thing themselves.

    Like or Dislike: or 0 ()
    Reply to this comment
    • 62strong says:
      Posted: 30 Aug 18

      I’m with you brother.woman only have to say yes.men have to do the work.porn is safer these days.

      Like or Dislike: or 0 ()
      Reply to this comment